In general life is short. We, often times, waste precious time on very useless, trivial pursuits. Be the excuse, vanity, tradition, or routine, unless the act of doing these things makes you happy, or better, you are missing minutes everyday. Minutes add to hours, then to days of wasted time.
An example I mostly refuse to waste time on, is making the bed. I loathe it. (unless it's fresh sheets, then it gets made up tight) it's pointless, the bed will bed will be messed again later on in the evening.... unless it's your job to make beds, and you're using gm it as extra practice to perfect your craft.... why? It helps in no other area of your life. 5 minutes wasted every day... it adds up.
I also don't match my socks. I match TYPES of socks, but if they do happen to be different colors, so be it. No one is gonna notice anyways.
It's not the act of not matching socks that makes me happy, I'm happy in NOT WORRYING about having mismatched socks, I'm happy in not wasting time making the bed.
Life in general is short, so why waste it doing the monotonous tasks that don't add value to it. Why not free up that time for activities that bring peace, and happiness to ones self? Free up time to enjoy the little, oft missed, wonders of life, wonders that are missed, as we're rushing around trying to find that pesky matching sock the dryer ate up.
Mine is/was my garage. I have project vehicles that I have BIG plans for.... and until tonight, I'd used my dirty garage, that a can't/couldn't fathom fitting a vehicle into, let alone work on and around it. It was a maze, of Christmas decoration boxes, boxes of baby clothes, power tools and tool carts, an air tank for a future air compressor... etc etc...
Remember Tetris? (Of course you remember Tetris) Sometimes our lives need a little Tetris to rearrange what we have RIGHT IN FRONT of us, so that we can kick ourselves in the butt. So that we can begin moving forward again. That was my garage, but what is it for you??
Theodore Roosevelt said "Do what you can, with what you have, where you are."
So play a little Tetris with what is right in front of you. Baby steps. But you can move forward a day at a time, but forward.
Depression isn't an On or Off type of symptom. (I'm not saying depression is like autism don't take it there) Like autism, I believe depression is a spectrum... there's "I don't have enough cash to go to lunch today" depression, to "I'm miserable and feel useless goodbye cruel world" depression.
There's a wide variety of issues that can lead a man into the rabbit hole of depression, but in today's societal standards men aren't "allowed" to talk about it. Sure we have to deal with the repercussions of the events leading to it, but we cannot express how much the situation grinds our gears, wears us down, and breaks us apart. We HAVE to be the head of house, the team leader. We have the broad shoulders to carry the weight, because we're MEN, that's what we do.
It's a double edged sword society has put in our hands, because they want us to keep moving on in the midst of the issues we bear, and when it all comes raining down, so much that we cannot fathom taking anymore, we explode outwardly, with anger or violence, we're labeled dangerous, with our "toxic masculinity" another label slapped across our faces. Or we implode, ending things the only way we have figured, the only option we feel we have left, suicide. Then we're labeled selfish, and rhetorically asked "why wouldn't he talk to us"
So dudes and dudettes..... STOP.... stop teaching your boys societal norms that are so dangerous to us. And START talking about stuff that ails you. Be open from when your children are young, and teach them that it's ok to open up. Society doesn't give a single crap about YOUR feelings, so take that in consideration when restraints are put on you, that they won't accept themselves.
